Iveta Irvingová

“And one day I was already back from school and dad came home from his morning shift, he would always come after 2 pm from his morning shift, and for an afternoon shift, he would leave before two and stay until about 10 pm. And I always heard the familiar sound. A metallic sound of the clothes hanger against the rod, a sort of sigh when he was taking his shoes of… but suddenly, all was quiet. And I even did not hear him close the door. So I sat for a while and then I went to see him. He sat in the hallway, he just collapsed on the seat. And then I went to look at him like this… I totally froze because he was beaten to pulp. And he was over seventy. But he still looked dapper and youthful, some fifty-three, fifty-five. In the Alcron Hotel, the cloakroom attendants poked fun at him, [telling him] 'You're so dashing, such a fine man.' The old crones, aged idunnowhat, drooled over him. And suddenly, a black eye, blood on his head. And I say: 'What has happened?' He looked at me this way and said: Now, my girl, you have to take me to the hospital.' I say: 'Oh my Good, so we'll call a taxi or the ambulance.' - 'No.' So he laid his attache case aside and walked those two storeys across that garden. Now, he limped, he had a bad leg, his hand was injured. And he said, 'You need to drive me there.' [That meant] my first time of driving that tiny Fiat and go to that hospital. I became queasy, I started shaking and crying and I told him, 'For the love of God, dad, I can't do this.' - 'I'll help you holding the steering wheel, I will tell you what pedals to push. We'll just go. I want us to be back home before mom returns from work. So, well, for the first time in my life, I sat into this car, and he achingly – at that point, he was almost screaming in pain – had to reverse out of the garage, I wouldn't have dared that. So he reversed to the street and we drove across the Vinohrady neighbourhood through the three horrible crossroads to the Vinohrady hospital. I don't know how I got there, I was in one long shock. I drove on the second gear all the way, I think, I couldn't do any better. I think it [the car] had only three or four gears. And there [in hospital], he spent terrible many hours there. We knew we wouldn't make it anyway. There was a wonderful doctor, a surgeon. He did x-rays, bandages, everything. And then I heard in the hallway how he said: 'Mr. Irving, please, regarding that you are with a child here, that you have your car here, leave your keys with me, I'll have you taken home by ambulance and I'll gladly drive your car to your house later. It's not a problem, I'll be happy to do it for you.' It surprised me quite a bit, that doctors probably do not offer to everyone. Well, the point is… For horrible many years, he was bedbound, he cried in pain, he had a bad concussion, broken ankle, three broken ribs, abrasions… I remember this the most, how we took turns [caring for him] with mom, or with grandma and grandpa, I would go to school. And the point is, in that very Alcron hotel where he worked, it was not only a meeting place for the RAF officers but on the other hand, it was a popular meeting place for the State Security.”

“'There will always friends who will guide you. You know, you cannot rely much on your mom.' That's how he answered when I asked whether he would come and advise me from heaven when he won't be here; he replied: 'Yes, I will always look after you.' And I think that he is doing that. The truth is, when there is either a totally marvelous time… Not 'is' [but] 'was'. Now, there has not been a marvelous time for long, for years… So he always came to me, then, sometimes, along with my mom. I used to ask her about it on purpose when she was leaving. And when things are bad, when things are very bad, he comes to me at night as well. And it happened in that one worst moment of my life, when I was fully aware, smoked a cigarette and looked out of the little window in the little house in Úherec, against the Moon that shone on that spot on the sofa of his when he went for a smoke, which he loved to do and which I inherited from him. So, he appeared there… and I won't ever forget that sight. I got totally stiff and the cigarette was there like this when I stared. Now I was too scared even to breathe, even less to talk because it was obvious that the apparition would disappear. I won't forget that look until my death because it was exactly that terribly sharp look of his, with pursed lips, and then a sort of pensive look out of the window towards that Moon. Then he blew of sorts and he looked sideways on that bed and then he frowned like that. And then I saw the ash on the cigarette, that I need to flick off the ash urgently, so I glanced aside, I flicked it off on that nighstand and the apparition was gone at the very moment. [Then] I said [to myself], 'You dumbass, you should have let it drop on the floor.' Only later, I got the point, what he wanted to tell me, because it wsa the day before the twenty-year-old Romanian crashed to me when I was riding my motorbike. And that I'm half-dead on that road.”