Jan Payne

“And we did politics there. It was interesting. It was unique. It would be really easy to film it because we were sitting in Laterna magica, there was an auditorium. And the stage was behind it and Václav Havel was sitting on it. Saša Vondra was sitting next to him. And different people gave speeches there. For example, general Vacek came and said that the troops were somewhere. I don´t know what they said at that time - I did not write it. I should have written a diary. Then Mlynář came. And then we voted. To put it simply, the people who were sitting in the auditorium created history. And Havel was there as a presenter. He asked every time before we started to negotiate: ‘Is there anyone whom nobody knows?‘ Sometimes it happened that two or three people left. And the others voted. So, we voted who would become a minister. And I remember that everybody refused Mlynář. It was planned that Mlynář would be in the government. But the whole Civic Forum - each of us who were there - raised hands against Mlynář. So, he went back to Vienna. So that is how history was made. It was a fantastic performance, and it will never happen again. It was completely unique. It was the interactive super modern performance and the history of the Czech Republic took place there.”

“It never happened to me that they would assault us. The point was that when we arranged it, we always talked about ‘Libštát‘. And the policemen always came to Libštát and they guarded it there. But ‘Libštát‘ was somewhere else every time. And they were not able to find out where with the equipment they had at that time. I never saw that they would pick one of us. But the thread was there - it was necessary to bear it in mind. And it was such a life-giving spring in the decadence that was there. I always came back cheered up because of what we were talking about there. It always started in the afternoon and we talked in the evening and till the morning. It was easier for the priest because they work on Sundays and they have some free time before Monday after the sermon. But I had to go to work on Monday, so it was a bit stressing for me. However, I liked to go there.”

“I went on a demonstration. They arrested us there and took us somewhere in Příbram. And they started to interrogate us and give us fines. So, they gave me a receipt that I also got a fine. So, I looked at his shoulders - he was probably a captain - and I said: ‘Mr. captain why do you do it? Look! They are students!‘ He looked at me for a moment and then he took out a yellow piece of paper and put something green on it. Then they locked me for “forty-eight”. They let me go and told me that it would continue. But then the revolution came so it did not continue.”

“And I learned from Existentialist philosophers: to keep my authenticity. To stay myself. To stay authentic even under the worst circumstances so that I do not have to be ashamed of myself. I followed it in the time of ‘A Few Sentences‘. I also shared it and I said to my colleagues -doctors: ‘So that you do not have to be ashamed in front of your children.‘ It is a criterion. I do not have to be ashamed in front of my children. Of course, I could have done more. Everyone could have. But I think that this is universal. One simply cannot let it be. So, I am involved even nowadays. Fortunately, nowadays I am not at risk of being arrested. But I am at risk of losing some time that one has for other things. But I think that one has to be involved. It just is not possible without it. When you have a house, you have to take care of the roof, so the water does not pour through it. But it does not mean that you become a tinsmith. You have to arrange it somehow. You have to take care of it. And this way, we have to take care of politics. Even though you do not want to be a politician, you have to look after it. And I have always done it like this.”

“And then it happened that Jan Patočka died in spring. I attended the funeral and so they checked my ID. State Security officers sent it to the faculty. All people from other faculties were expelled and we were also at risk (of it). I was there and two colleagues from Medicine who did not attended the funeral, but they brought a wreath there the following day were there as well, and they also picked them up. So, the three of us were supposed to be expelled. The faculty secretary, a doctor Švach, was supposed to expel us at that time. Doctor Švach was a prosecutor in the fifties and he sent people to death. He always invited us just to scare us and he shouted at us: ‘We are going to expel you! Go away!‘ It went like this for several months - it was in March when Patočka died. It then lasted for approximately three months. And meanwhile the Dean - I want to appreciate it - decided to invite us. He had to do it behind Švach´s back because he was also afraid of him. And one by one he said to us: ‘You are amazing students; it would be a pity if you finished like this in the fifth year so I put it away and you can keep on studying.”